Saturday, April 11, 2015

So Much for Language Skills

So my beloved is better, it seems. Turns out he was never not okay. I thought he was dealing with haunting hallucinations of Sam and people from his past but it seems I may have made a lot of leaps of logic when I came to that conclusion.

Maybe I've spent too much time babysitting Moth. Hes actually going through some of that... granted Moth is being haunted by far more than his past.

But I digress, David was out on some R&R with what I keep insisting was not actually Sam and trying to figure out how to keep that phantom without taking a knee. Something I could have helped with if David wasn't a brick wall to my uh... unnatural...ess...ness.

Unnaturallessness, I got that shit.

I have such a way with words.

I'm gonna be honest, I'd sad David made the choice he did. I won't spoil it. Its not my place to say. But to suffice to say to his commenters, he already did whatever it was he did. Now that hes got that sorted out, my trial run taking care of Em is coming to a close.

I'll miss her. I'm sure Jack will to. He's only recently realized what a shit he was being. Such a thick headed little shit. David assures me I can come visit her, and him, anytime. And I will visit him. But it feels weird spending time with her out there.

I can feel eyes on me. A burning accusation. A searing hatred over my shoulder. That lingering in the air before an argument breaks out, just as soon as someone breaks the tension. I haven't felt that here. But something out there, something hovering over Em or David that can't quite reach her here, doesn't want me around her.

I suspect that's why Father is keeping her with David. Because it's safe there. She has a well sought after soul. The child burns with potential. And as the filth in this world piles on to dampen her light, the clamor in to try to pluck it. Its heart breaking in its own way. I know the feeling. I was there once.

I wish I could remember what color my hair is supposed to be. I think I would dye it like that, just so I could see what I could have been. I guess the real question is, would I be any less of an asshole as a ginger.

Where would I even get freckles though? I'm not drawing them on. Fuck that. Too tacky. I'd have to do blonde. At that point, I might as well just let it stay white.

But I've been making the most of what little time I have with Em. Shes excited to see her grandpa again and I can hardly blame her. I am too. There aren't a lot of people out there that are happy to see me.

And in the meantime I've been teaching her to craft... talking to her about some of the filth that's flooded her life. You know, when she feels like opening up. I don't push. I can see its hard for her. But I also know talking through it can help. Better than the alternative by a long shot. When people don't work these kind of things out, they tend to act them out. Thus the abuse spiral is born.

Speaking of an abuse spiral, Jack apparently also gave Em a little crafting lesson. Some rather advanced stuff for someone who 'doesn't know how to craft'. I'm watching you boy-o.

I've been drilling her on what he taught her, just to be safe so she doesn't accidentally hurt herself with it. Jack certainly didn't teach her any of the tentative safety precautions and soon she won't have the safety net of this look to protect her so we have to make sure she has everything she learned while she was here absolutely nailed down.

I couldn't live with myself if my trying to help her accidentally got her killed.

A final congratulations to Sloth for subduing the Fire Cult in the most assholish way possible. Good job. I certainly hold your rash actions don't have any unforeseen consequences.

And a congratulations for April and Slicer. Have fun living the the dream you to. Or a the closest available proximity to it there of.

Fracture out!


  1. To see what colour your hair was before, look at your eyebrows and body hair.

    1. Then I'd leave it white... It'd be odd if you were fiery ginger but then all of a sudden there's a ski slope on your crotch.

      Or you could try platinum blonde.

    2. I could try dying everything

    3. I'm not so sure it's safe to dye in certain places. At least not with a box dye.

      Warning: red runs. Avoid white towels. Or ruin them. Although that's for vivid reds, mostly.